The Accidental Minecraft Family: Book 15 Read online

  “Wait a minute,” she said and walked over to the drooling cat.

  Bruce’s eyes were shut and he was sniffing the air, licking his lips. Mom raised an eyebrow. She sniffed but couldn’t smell anything. She knew a cat's sense of smell was much better than a human’s, so she leaned down and snatched Bruce up. Bruce’s nose wouldn’t lie.

  “MErow!” Bruce shouted, startled, nearly scratching Mom’s arms.

  “Oh knock it off. You’re fine. You need to help me find Dad,” Mom said.

  “Meow?” Bruce asked.

  She tucked Bruce under her arm, carrying him like a sack of potatoes. “Sniff him out, boy!” She turned, aiming Bruce in multiple directions. As she slowly turned, Bruce started sniffing, and more drool pooled and dripped from his lips. Mom nodded and walked in the direction Bruce was pointed. They walked around the village, stopping to sniff and drool several more times until they ended up in front of a house.

  The house was two stories, with a small lawn that had a bale of hay in the middle. Bruce was squirming under her arm, and she dropped him, noticing that her entire arm was covered in drool. “Gross!” she said, waving it in the air, sprinkles of drool drops flinging everywhere. Bruce hit the ground and took off like a rocket, climbing up the side of the house into a window.

  Mom put her hands on her hips. “Hmph, this must be the place.”

  She walked up to the house and opened the door. Inside she saw Dad and a man in a white apron moving quite strangely- dancing perhaps?- in front of something that looked like a souped-up furnace, with large, flickering flames and smoke pouring out the top. They were both singing loudly.

  “Oh, we love toooooo

  Bar-be-cue!

  Bar-be-cue!

  Put that meat on and cook a few!

  Heat those coals

  and bake those rolls

  Cook that beef

  ‘til it fills your soul!

  Sniff it

  Smell it

  Taste it

  Don’t waste it!

  Life is better with some barbecue!”

  Mom blinked slowly. She rubbed her eyes. She closed them tightly, then opened them again. They were still singing and dancing. She chuckled silently, put her hands on her hips, and said, “AHEM!” giving off the strongest ‘The Look’ she could. The two dancing men kept carrying on. Now Bruce had jumped in the middle of them, frolicking on his two hind legs like it was something they did every day.

  “Oh, we love toooooo

  Bar-be-cue!

  Bar-be-cue!

  Put that meat on and cook a few!

  Meow!

  Smokey!

  Spicey!

  Tasty!

  Yummy!

  Cook it up good, put it in my tummy!

  Meow meow!

  Bar-be-cue!

  Bar-be-cue!

  Life is better with some barbecue!”

  Mom sighed, took a pumpkin pie from her inventory, and threw it right at Dad's face. Dad didn’t even have time to realize what was going on when SPLAT! His face was covered in pumpkin pie, and he landed on his butt, spluttering. “Huh!? What?!”

  Bruce wasted no time gobbling up the pie on the floor, and made sure to lick Dad’s face clean, too.

  “Yuck! Bruce, stop!” Dad wiped his face and, as his hand came away from his eyes, he saw Mom in the doorway, her hands on her hips. “Oh, hi honey!”

  “Aren’t we supposed to be doing something?” Mom asked.

  Dad gestured towards the smoker. “We are doing something.”

  “Something important?”

  “It is important!” Dad said.

  “Barrrrrbeeeeecuuuuuueeeee!” Dad and Myron said together.

  Mom rolled her eyes. “We’re supposed to be leaving! You made it clear we need to be quick about it.”

  Dad looked confused for a moment. “Oh. Right. Sorry! Myron was just showing me his smoker, and, er... I thought... oh, yeah. I thought we should have some food for the road.”

  “We have plenty of food, dear,” Mom said.

  “Well yeah, but not barbecue.”

  Mom blew out a breath. “Could you please just hurry? Everyone is waiting.”

  Dad nodded, then turned back to his friend.

  “Myron! You know what would go good with this sweet pumpkin pie?”

  “Extra spicy barbecue!” they shouted at the same time.

  Mom shook her head and walked back out. “Men!”

  Chapter 7

  Some time later, they were all finally ready. Dad showed up with Myron and handed out delicious hot barbecue. He handed a piece to Mom and wiggled his eyebrows at her.

  “Thank you, dear, but I’m not hungry.

  He wiggled his eyebrows again, looking at the barbecue in her hand.

  “Really, I had a big breakfast.”

  He wiggled his eyebrows harder, looking at the barbecue in her hand, then back at her face, and grinned maniacally.

  Mom sighed and took a bite. “Alright, it’s delicious,” she said, eating more of it.

  “YES!” Dad and Myron shouted together. “BAAAARRBEEECUUUEEE!!!”

  They feasted on the delicious barbecue, Dad and Myron watching people much too intensely, grinning like madmen each time someone took a bite. Birgitta finished hers and approached Dad. He wiggled his eyebrows. “Good barbecue, wasn’t it?”

  Birgitta nodded. “Yes, you two did a great job on that. But what was it you wanted to ask me about earlier?”

  “Earlier?” Dad asked.

  Birgitta’s eyebrows knit together in a confused look. “Yes, before you ran off with Myron, you said you had something important to ask.”

  “OH!” Dad smacked his forehead. “I almost forgot.”

  “You did forget,” the girl said.

  “Oh. Right. Do you know of a way to break a curse?”

  Birgitta thought for a moment. “Well, you could always drink some milk.”

  Dad frowned. “Thank you, but I'm not really thirsty. I just have this problem I’m trying to fix.”

  Birgitta laughed. “No! Drinking milk can remove bad things from you. Like blindness or being slow or things like that.”

  “THAT’S IT!?” Dad shouted, startling Birgitta, who jumped back. “I’ve been having nightmares and worried sick about this, and all I have to do is DRINK MILK!?”

  Birgitta shrugged. “I don’t know if it will work. I’ve only read about it. I’ve never seen it with my own eyes.”

  Dad blew out a breath. “KATE? KATE! Fetch me a cow!”

  Kate ran up to him. “What is going on? Are you okay? Why do you need a cow?”

  He explained the situation and Kate turned red in the face. “Oh yeah! I remember that now. I should have thought of that. Oops.”

  “Wait, you knew that would work?”

  Kate sighed. “I never had to before, but now that you mention it, I do remember hearing about that.” Dad looked like he was about to be very annoyed, and Kate waved at him. “I’m going to go find a cow! See ya!” She ran off.

  Everybody finished eating their barbecue while Dad paced at the other entrance of the village that led to the savanna biome, mumbling and grumbling. “Rutton sutton... drink... milk...” was all Kate heard as she walked up to him a short while later with a cow on a lead.

  “I present to you... A COW!” Kate said with a flourish.

  Dad hugged her, his previous annoyance replaced with happiness. He looked the cow up and down. “How now, brown cow?” he asked it. The cow mooed. Dad looked under the cow.

  “Uhm, Dad? What are you doing?” Kate asked.

  “Looking for its udder. Remember? I need milk.” He laid all the way on the ground to search the cow for its milk dispensing part. Kate giggled at him. He poked his head out from under the cow. “What’s so funny?”

  Kate pulled a bucket from her inventory and used it on the cow, coming away with a bucket of milk. “Here, Dad.”

  “Oh.” Dad climbed out from under the cow. “I guess that is a more Minecra
fty way to do things.” He took the bucket, looked around for a glass, but shrugged and took a big sip.

  Dad squeezed his eyes closed and mumbled, “Please work, please work, please work.” He blinked one eye open and then the other, just in time to watch the Worst Omen curse icon blink and fade away.

  “IT WORKED!” he shouted and jumped into the air, startling Kate. He pulled her into an enormous hug.

  “Dad. Can’t. Breathe.”

  Dad released her and ran back to the group, who had formed into a line, ready to go. He grabbed Mom and hugged her just as hard as he had hugged Kate, but gave her a huge kiss, too.

  “GROSS!” Jack yelled.

  “What was that for?” Mom asked with a smile.

  “Birgitta and Kate helped me remove the curse.”

  “Really? That’s wonderful news! Now I don’t have to worry so much. Was it hard? Did it hurt?”

  Dad shook his head as Birgitta came up, smiling. “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you back in the other village, Mr. Smith. I thought you already knew how to remove bad things.”

  “It’s alright,” Dad said, “there’s so much to know in this world. Sometimes I feel like I’m still learning everything.”

  Mom nodded, hugging Birgitta. “Thank you for helping.” She looked at Dad. “Are we ready to go now?

  Dad nodded, and jump-stacked a couple of dirt blocks. “Attention everyone! Now that we’ve had the most perfect food ever to grace the planet-” Mom coughed- “It’s time to get moving!” He waved his hand. “Let’s GOOO!”

  The horde of villagers and animals started walking out of the village like a giant parade. There were so many people and wolves and horses and a single ninja cat.

  The desert was hot and sandy, and with so many people, they moved slowly through it. They stopped to craft the occasional drinking spot for the animals, and once they even built a small ledge and placed water on top to pour down, simply for them to play in and cool off.

  “It’s like a splash pad!” Jack shouted as he somersaulted through the water.

  Bruce looked on in disdain, having no interest in getting wet.

  Night came and between the Smiths and the double-E villagers, they were able to craft a huge sand bunker to keep everyone safe.

  As they worked, the Smiths taught the new villagers how to craft and mine. They had enough resources to give everyone stone tools, and before the moon was all the way in the sky, there was a comfortable bunker big enough for everyone.

  They had mined all the beds from the village and put them together in the bunker. Finally, after a pretty intense barbecue competition between Dad and Myron, everyone was stuffed to the brim and sound asleep. The Smiths had set up their beds first thing so they could reset their spawn points without going to sleep, and Kate was up keeping watch in case any red-eyed monsters that could break in appeared.

  Jack had built stairs inside the bunker, and Kate was sitting on the roof with Fang and Bruce, watching the moon. “You know, it really is pretty, but I do miss the sky from back home.” She looked over expecting to see her pets commiserating with her, instead she saw the two of them rolling around play fighting.

  “Hiss, growl,” Bruce said as he leapt onto Fang’s back. Fang yipped and bucked the cat off, standing over him, and putting Bruce's entire face in his mouth.

  “You guys! I’m trying to have a moment here.” Kate said. “You’re supposed to understand and listen to me!”

  They rolled and fought and yipped and yowled, crashing into Kate. “That’s it!” she said and tossed Bruce off the roof.

  “Meooow?” Bruce said as he flipped through the air and landed on his feet in the sand. He zipped back up to the roof, and Fang pounced on him, and they continued to play fight, bumping into Kate again.

  “UGH!” Kate jump-stacked a small pillar of sand so she could have some peace. The two animals rolled around so fiercely they crashed into the sand pillar, breaking one of the blocks and Kate let out a scream as she fell with the pillar. “Ya darn cat!” she yelled.

  Mom’s head popped out of the hole leading into the bunker. “Are you alright dear? ACK!” she yelled as Fang crashed into her. “What in the world is going on!” She spat out wolf fur.

  “These animals are crazy!” Kate said, gesturing at the two of them.

  Mom gave the animals ‘The Look,’ but nothing happened. She sighed. “Alright dear, I think it’s my turn to take watch, anyway. You go get some rest.”

  Kate nodded, gave her mom a hug, and went down the stairs.

  Mom sat on top of the bunker looking out across the desert. She watched the peaceful, deep-blue sky, how the light from the moon shone off the clouds and square stars. “It really is quite beauti- ACK!” a wolf tail smacked her in the face and she had to spit out more fur.

  Chapter 8

  “WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!” The double-e’s shouted, waking up everyone in the bunker.

  Dad jumped out of bed, hitting his head hard, a sand block burst above him. “Guys!” Dad shook the sand from his hair. “You have to stop doing that!”

  Ethan pointed out a window. “This time it's true. Look!”

  Dad looked and his eyebrows shot up. Outside the bunker outside was surrounded by husks. More than he had seen a few nights ago when he had made his jump-stack tower looking for Jack. “Why are there so many husks in this desert?”

  “I can answer that,” the cleric villager said. “This area is called the Desert of Lost homes. Long ago, these were plains with a huge village on it. The village spanned the whole biome and thousands of people lived there. Then one day, the plains started drying up. Nobody knows exactly what happened, but slowly the lush green grass faded and turned to sand, the sun burned hotter and the villagers all poofed. Ever since, this desert has had nearly as many husks in it as grains of sand.”

  “Well, there aren’t THAT many husks,” Elijah said.

  “It’s just a phrase!” Ethan shook his head.

  Elijah shrugged. “I’m just saying... sure there’s a lot, but not like THAT many.”

  “There's more than I’ve ever seen!” Ethan said.

  “You’ve never seen ANY husks!”

  “Have too!”

  “Have not!”

  “Have too!”

  “Have not!”

  “Boys!” Mom closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose. “You’re both right. Now can you please keep it down so we can think?”

  “Have too,” Ethan whispered. Elijah stuck his tongue out at him. Mom rolled her eyes.

  “What are we going to do?” Mom asked Dad.

  “That’s easy.” Jack said. “They don’t have red eyes or anything, let’s just lavapoof them.”

  “Lavapoof?” Kate asked. “That’s not a word.”

  “It is now. I just made it up.”

  “But it’s not a REAL word.” Kate crossed her arms.

  “I’m using it, so it’s real NOW.” Jack crossed his arms, too. “How could I say it if it wasn’t real? Lavapoof lavapoof lavapoof...”

  Kate covered her ears and hummed.

  “Lavapoof lavapoof lavapoof...”

  “I can’t hear you,” she said, humming louder.

  “Lavapoof lavapoof lavapo-”

  “OH MY GOODNESS!” Mom pulled at her hair. “You two are driving me crazy!”

  “And you thought we were bad!” Ethan said.

  “UGH!” Mom threw her hands in the air and walked back to the furnace to go cook something.

  “Maybe she should just ragepoof them,” Jack mumbled.

  Dad sighed. “Alright you guys, be nice to Mom.”

  “So can we lavapoof them, Dad?” Jack asked.

  “That’s not-” Kate started.

  “AH!” Dad said, cutting her off. “We need ideas now, not more annoying fighting.”

  “I’m not annoying!” Kate said.

  “Yes you-”

  “Enough!” Dad said pointing at Jack. “Ideas only! One more argument from you two and I’ll take
the double-E’s fighting and you will have to stay inside.”

  “Aww,” Jack whined.

  “That sounds like you’re punishing us,” Elijah said. “What’d we do wrong?”